What a hell of a week!!!I though last week was tough but i didnt thought it could get any worst until this week came.This last few days was a self test: emotionally and physically.

Monday to thursday was as what as expected......lots of hard training and preparation for two competitions: sepak takraw and GPA.I was quite stressed up during that period having too much thoughts on my head...was thinking bout soccer,GPA,sepak takraw,schoolwork,jersey and some other stuff which i couldnt recall.In short i was troubled with so many agendas and in the midst off that..once i kicked my friend's face unintentionally...sorry man...

The turning point of the week came comes friday.Sepak takraw tournament day.HAd high for myself but ironically i had no confidence in the team having people who can play.We end up clinching fourth palce,nothing to be proud of with, in a competition with only six participating teams.I WAS REALLY DISSAPOINTED...DISSAPOINTED WITH THIS CUTE GUY WHO IS TYPING....i really could have done better.....i could have controlled the game .Silly me keep serving the ball to their best player when i could have just attack the weakest link.So much for having that advantage of 5 years takraw experience.....cant blame some players for their mistake because TECHNICALLY SPEAKING its their first official competitive game...WE could have got second place if not for me ....congrats to chankat changi for being champion and our takraw buddy,MI for being runner up.....sometime i feel like a total failure.

And today didnt get better....it worst...adds on to my misery.Practice was bad..didnt prove at all to him during friendly and made countless mistake.So typical of me....so im still in the waiting list,waiting to get into the team.

Felt bad for not taking the time on friday night to memorize my lines....so in the morning after soccer i quickly ran through it.Had mixed feelings before the performance but was utterly sad after the act.I let the whole team down!! I totally forgot one line which i was suppose to give a que for everyone to recite but instead i forgot and started singing(which was supposed to be done after the reciatation)....and that line was a concluding statement and imagine how important it is and i screwed things up.....Guys im really terribly sorry....i know saying sorry cant change the fate but that the best i can do...sorry again.I was not sad that we didnt win but was sad that i did not give my heart and soul into this performance and always playing a fool during practice.Did not take time to practice on my own to improve my performance.Due to that i cant express my self well and get into the chracter well.

I really want to have a feel of achieving something.Really envied those who won.They deserve it.I dunno why but teams who have me just cant seem to achieve something.So figure out for yourself what i am.

I sometime feel that eveything i can do,others can do them better.im only selected because im there to volunteer. i dont have any talents at all.......

Anyway....dinner at sakura changed my mood completely and i was back to my normal self. Yipeee.

Sad to say also that syikin is leaving yjc for sp.....she is quiting yjc on thursday.....such a great pal and friend to be with is leaving...will really miss my 'duet-partner'...had lots of laugh and fun with her.....so good luck girl.

Thats all for the longest week so far....................................